Mr. Cliche

Have been thinking of a post on Asterix for sometime but am still gathering material. Until then here's a comic Shankar and I found in our third year while researching for commentator clip art. Sorry for the small print. Click on the picture for an enlarged version.

From my Balcony

Things I can see from my balcony:

1. Ducks (mostly white and brown) splashing about in a puddle.

2. Buffalo trying to cool themselves by soaking in the mud.

3. A white bird (it looks like a stork) pecking a buffalo's back while the buffalo swishes at it with its tail. The bird though continualy avoids the tail making it seem as if it is using the tail as a skipping rope.

4. Four sheep sleeping near two brown cows.

The dog has not barked at me in two days now. I have tried to provoke it by staring at it but it has not responded. I am worried. Maybe the heat is getting to it. On a more positive note, watermelons are now available in the market ar fifteen rupees a kilo.

Gyan gained from Big Bang

Viagra was initially developed as a treatment for heart problems. Researchers became suspicious that it might have a positive side effect only when patients who had taken part in a clinical trial steadfastly refused to hand back their pills although the drugs had virtually no impact on their heart problems.

The seminal 1948 paper titled "The Origin of Chemical Elements", which correctly theorized that the universe orignated from a Big Bang, was authored by Ralph Alpher, Hans Bethe and George Gamow. (Alpha, Beta, Gama).

Sryon's 8th FART, dealing with the idiosyncracies of the Indian Railways, is among his best yet.

Bentick Street II

Iv'e sat for nine hours at Bentick Street over the last couple of days. I have learnt the following:

1. Kalam Bhai's trainee, Akhtar, has a girlfriend but cannot get married to her because he doesn't earn enough to "maintain" her and his dad doesn't want her in his house.

2. Kalam Bhai's boss, known simply as "Chacha", is a cranky old man who doesn't love bicycles at all but knows accounts pretty well. He hates it if Kalam Bhai takes too long to diagnose my cycle because other customers are waiting.

3. Kalam Bhai charges only 60 rupees to fit an entire cycle. American mechanics charge about $100 for the same work.

4. Kalam Bhai gets only five thousand rupees a month from Chacha. Given that he is the only person in Calcutta who can fix geared cycles this is pretty low. He has gotten himself a passport and is looking for work in Dubai.

5. The tea next to Kalam Bhai's shop is pretty good.

6. Kalam Bhai also get its wrong sometimes. Yesterday he insisted that the problem with my cycle was originating from the new freewheel which had to adjust to the chain. I could pretty much see that the problem was with the worn chain. I bought a new chain today and its running smoothly.

On public edutainment

Went to the planetarium the other day with Sunny. The twenty minute show carried out by a cranky old lady was quite disappointing: It didn't contain any information which a class five student who reads the newspaper wouldn't know. The planetarium got me thinking though on the merits of a classical libertarian society. Let us start with the reasonable utilitarian assumption that the goal of any society is to maximize welfare. Let us also assume that at least certain astronomical discoveries bring positive societal utility far in excess of the amount required to establish and maintain a planetarium.

Now, given that most kids today would rather play with their Xbox's than visit the planetarium (I bizarrely remember a Southpark episode which makes this point) little corporate profit would flow from a private planetarium. Private enterprise is thus unable to provide an avenue through which a young kid interested in astronomy could cultivate his interest and go on to make discoveries which bring great societal utility. Utilitarian analysis thus shows us that it is important that the government collect taxes to fund public edutainment projects.

Phew!

Finished the puzzle at 2:30 AM in the morning. There was one piece missing. It was fun and frustrating and if anyone is looking to buy me a nice present I know a couple of jigsaws that I've had my eye on.

The producer of Spanish Football highlights on Star Sports is one of the less intelligent people I know. The highlights show starts with a table showing the scores of all the matches played that week. Thereafter, before the highlights of an individual match is telecast, the score of that match is shown. As if we hadn't already got it, as soon as the highlights start, the commentator will inform us "This is Real Madrid versus Barcelona. The match ended two nil Real". And after building up the suspense the producer expects us to get excited when the commentator shouts, "..and here's Ronaldinho with the ball in the area with only the keeper to beaaaaaaat!".

Spent about 6 hours in Bentick Street repairing Surya's and my cycle. Learnt a fair bit about cycle repair too. Very tired now. On the flipside, permits to go east of Thimpu seem to be a major hassle.

Olympus DPS I

I've decided to buy the Olympus DPS I binocular to start stargazing with. Its a 10x50 binocular which means that it has a magnification of 10 and a 50 mm aperture. They say that you can view the rings of Saturn with this power but I doubt it. I do know though that its great for viewing deep sky objects like the Andromeda Galaxy. It costs about 3000 rupees which is a bit expensive but mom has offered to buy it for me as a graduation gift. I'm still debating as to whether I should take up that offer or buy the thing with some saved up cash I have. I am also looking for a place where I can buy elementary star charts for the East Indian region.

The sky is still too overcast to see any stars but I did get a glimpse of the moon today and viewing craters on it shall be fun. Hopefully the lack of lights in Bhutan will coincide with clear skies and some good views will be possible.

From across the Atlantic

I had a three hour long chat with Suv today. I had a similar conversation with Nobby the other day. I haven't met these guys in over six years and we live in different continents and experince widely different cultures. The thing that I have come to realize though is that our primary desires are fundamentally the same. We may have chosen different ways to make our livelihood and may differ in our political ideologies but Suv, who derides me as a romantic, says he wants to go bungee jumping, wing suit diving and see the world. Nobby loves riding his bike and in four years time is ready to ride across India with me. This is widely different than wanting to spend one's money on the latest flat screen television or cellphone. I dont grude people thier choices but its good to know that Nobby and Suv exist.

My Jigsaw Puzzle

Over the last couple of days Iv'e been doing a jigsaw puzzle which Sunny got me from Thailand. As you can see from the picture I'm about two-tenths of the way through this six-hundrend piece puzzle. I think this is pretty good progress given that I'm tackling a puzzle after 10 years or so. Mom pitched in this afternoon (more like hijacked my puzzle) and helped me quite a bit. She's good at jigsaws and once completed a 5000 piece monster.

I wonder how many parents today take time off from thier yoga classes and thier Blackberrys to teach thier kids how to make jigwas puzzles. I wonder how many kids tear themselves away from thier Xbox's and Plasma TVs to make jigsaws. From all accounts, not many. Should I judge this trend? I think I shall. I think it is important that a kid learns how to make a jigsaw. It is important that a kid learns that not all positive results are instantly achiveable and patience is sometimes infinitely rewarding. I think kids who do tackle jigsaw puzzles are those that can, later, reap the rewards of reading long and difficult books, cycling a hundred miles to no known destination, looking through a telescope for a galaxy that one may never find and solving that math problem that no one cares about.

Anyway, I'll keep you guys updated on how the puzzle comes along.

Stargazing Dreams

Big Bang by Simon Singh is a book that I would recommend to those who have an interest in astronomy or cosmology and have enjoyed the writings of science authors like Carl Sagan. Reading Big Bang has motivated me into getting myself some sort of instrument to view the stars with. To my surprise, a brief bit of online research informs me that a telescope is not really necessary for this and a you can see the rings of Saturn with a good pair of binoculars. These are expensive (though not as expensive as telescopes) and ironically, people who can afford them (like future Rahul) live in cities like London and Calcutta where the bright lights make stargazing impossible.

In political news, Condoleeza Rice has apologized for an illicit invasion into Barack Obama's passport files by the State Department and said that she will "stay on top of it and get to the bottom of it."

Thoughts on Memoirs of a Geisha

Read Memoirs of Gesiha recently. I wouldn't recommend it unless you have an interest in far eastern culture.

Interesting thing though: A Geisha is a Japanese woman who entertains men by singing, dancing and conversing with them. She may, at times, flirt with them but no sexual contact takes place. A Geisha's ultimate aim however is to find herself a Danna- A rich or powerful man (preferably both) who will keep her as his mistress and pay for her expensive tastes. Although Geisha are often looked down upon as high-class prostitutes in the west they are actually not very different from the scores of western women who train to be actresses from an early age (and spend fortunes on cosmetic surgery) and then , like Anna Nicole Smith, marry some rich guy who takes care of them in return for sex.

At the Gymkhana

Shankar once wrote that an university needs its sportsmen to know what uninhibited passion is. Yesterday, Sarbajeet and I played a game of tennis at 10:30 AM in about 37 degrees heat. Every game went to deuce and each rally was about 10 to 15 shots long. No inch was given or expected. Sarbajeet won the first set 6-4 and we abandoned the second set at 4-4 at 12 noon when the heat started to affect our eyes. It was a good game and I am happy to say that I retract my earlier statement about the future of sport in NUJS. There are a few good hands to take care of it.

Off the top of my head

This post is really about some stuff that I've found interesting in the last few days. Nothing that could fit under one head. I guess its something like Sryon's F.A.R.T's except its more personal.

In Northern Bavaria, the word kopperneksch, from Copernicus, means an unbelievable proposition or idea. The word revolutionary can also be attributed to Copernicus and his idea that the earth revolves around the sun and not vice-versa.

The ipod shuffle is a wonderful little gadget at most times. It clips on to almost anything and is ideal for cyclists. It is irritating at times though: The other day I wanted to listen to this song "All Tomorrow's Parties" and as much as I changed tracks I just couldn't find it. I was quite disturbed.

I wanted to call Suv the other day and didn't have his US number. A crazy idea struck me of calling up his mom and asking her for it. I was surprised to note that even after five years of not dialling it I remembered his home number: 3591714. I wonder how many numbers from college I'll remember five years down the line.

There's this stray dog near my house. Its black, white and beige. It barks at me every time I leave because Leo had chased it once. I tried to reason with it; bribe it with biscuits even but it keeps barking at me. I has never bitten me though. I think he's quite fond of me. I give him a reason for existing. I quite like him too. He's a constant in these turbulent times.

Thoughts on Michael Clayton

I like movies which have a point to make. I especially like movies which subvert dominant ideologies while pretending only to entertain. In Michael Clayton, George Clooney is a successful lawyer who is in possession of incriminating evidence in a $3Bn. class action lawsuit. Unknown to him, he is being followed by two hit men who have planted a bomb in his car. Suddenly, and for no apparent reason, Clooney gets off his car to climb a hill, take in some fresh air and watch some horses. While on the hill, the bomb in Clooney's car explodes. A shocked Clooney runs down the hill, throws his watch, phone and wallet into the fire and flees.

I don't know if the director had this in mind but I would like to think that what the movie is trying to tell us is that sometimes in order to save your soul you must leave that four hundred thousand dollar car of yours and climb to the top of a hill to watch the horses. If you want to increase your chances of salvation get rid of your Rolex, Blackberry and cash as well.

My Morning

Played a nice little game of tennis today. My singles game has improved and I think I've finally figured out the ball toss on the serve. It was hot though.

Also noticed a couple of interesting things while sitting at Vien today: First, a stray horse walked by us from out of nowhere. It was a little brown thing which calmly ambled up theatre road, smelt the garbage bins on the footpath and vanished into Loudon street. Presumably, he met the less intelligent creatures down the road. I also saw an old lady empty a mailbox. It was one of those old, red, penis shaped mailboxes which I last used in 1995. Didn't know they were still functional.

In other news, Skoda has launched a new car in India. It's called Skoda "Laura". A review going by the title, "Simply Awesome Laura" states that the car is essentially a redesigned Skoda Ocvtavia which had to be renamed since Octavia is still used in India. I mean, come on'.

Cosmetic Claims

Palmolive Aroma Therapy Shower Gel is apparently "anti-stress". Given that the whole point of having a bath is to cleanse and relax oneself, this is a claim that is rather difficult to refute.








Above: A stressed out lawyer wishing he had used Palmolive Aroma Therapy Shower Gel.

Corporate Finance Is Such a Drag

I went dressed as a girl for my corporate finance exam. It was my last exam in college. Got a few laughs, rattled a few tempers. Temporarily justified my existence I guess.

The wig belongs to Murtaza who got it from Pepsi. The blue top is Visa's. The pink pants and the boobs are mine. Rather, the tennis balls used as boobs are mine.

The exam went kinda okay as I knew it always would.

On another note, the long awaited fifth years versus fourth years tennis match happened today and Pramit and me beat the Bunty and Sarbojeet 6-0, 6-2, 6-1. I fear for the future of sport in NUJS.

Gali

We bought my dog Leo a stuffed tiger toy today. Its called Gali. So when you want Leo to bring you Gali you shout "GaliLeo".

Tentative Itinerary for Bhutan

This map shows our tentative path for the Bhutan trip. The graph shows the elevation we are going to gain at each point. From Mongar, we actually leave the highway and go to Luthse for a day before coming back onto it to go to Guwhati.

News just in that Liverpool have drawn Arsenal in the quarter finals of the Champions league. The two legs shall be played over a week and there's a Premier League game between us and Arse in that week. That makes it three games in 8 days with Arse. Unfortunately, the games are between 2nd and 9th April when I shall be in Bhutan. I do hope our hotels have ESPN. (Sigh)

Queen v. Hicklin

All law students know this one but I still find it an incredible coincidence that Queen v. Hicklin, the locus classicus on obscenity was decided by someone named Justice Cockburn. I mean, what are the chances?

Bentick Street

Spent about three hours at Bentick Street yesterday fixing Aneek's, Pramit's and Pillai's cycles for the Bhutan trip. I quite like going to Bentick Street. Kalam Bhai's (the only guy in Calcutta who knows anything about gears) shop is located in a narrow lane where people pee on the walls and there's seldom place to sit. But I help with the repair and the cycle is really a fascinating machine once you get to know how it works. It looks so simple but it takes a great deal of patience, skill and experience to get a cycle going right. And when it works perfectly, its smooth humming with the absence of any other sound gives one the same satisfaction as a batsman gets from hearing the sound of willow when he times a drive through cover.

In other news, messes Allan and Goetz, banking partners at White and Case, have been poached by Freshfields. I know this because I read it on Legal Week (yes, I do read Legal Week). I don't know how this affects anything though. I suppose White and Case feel the same way Barca did when Figo moved to Real.

I get by with a little help from my friends

Surya left hostel for the last time today. Shankar will leave tomorrow. Shankar says that it will take a cosmic coincidence for us to meet again. I disagree: Once we start leading our shitty lives and acknowledge the good times we had here we'll make time to meet.

On a different but related note, I'm surprised at how badly I'm affected by my friends leaving. Surya tells me that it's not something that happened for the first time. He says I'm sure I felt the same way when I left school and came to college. I'm not so sure. In 2003 I was a cocky bastard who didn't care whether he had people around him or not. I've changed. A popular Beatles song comes to mind:

When I was younger so much younger than today,
I never needed anybody's help in anyway.
Now that these days are gone I'm not so self assured.
Now I find Iv'e changed my mind and opened up the doors.

Of Masochism

Non-cyclists often assume that all cyclists cycle for roughly the same reason: Because we are masochistic, fit bastards who like traveling. The truth is we actually cycle for vastly different reasons. Bunty and I cycle for the adrenalin rush one gets from sheer speed, Surya cycles to enjoy the countryside and Indraneil cycles because he likes the sound of the highway. Having said that though I guess the reason we all cycle is because the environment we operate in gives us little room for self exploration and discussion of ideas that matter. On the bike one can think, and having thought, one can discuss. So yes, we are masochists who like to travel.

Of Last Times

For sometime now these posts will speak of a few "lasts". That is, with college coming to an end there will be a number of things I shall be doing for the last time. There have been a few already: Yesterday I sat for my last exam, the other day I attended my last class and, again, yesterday, I played my last game of 4-a side soccer in hostel. Soon friends will be leaving hostel for the last time, I will sit at the shack for a last time, rob the mess of one man's dinner for the last time and watch Liverpool's class on the hostel TV for the last time. They say that every end is a beginning. They also say that some things never change. Liars. Things do change and sometimes and end (much like a cigar) is just an end.

This is Tiger's Rest. It's a monastery in Paro, Bhutan. It is situated at a height of 900 Meters and one can only get there by climbing these very steep steps the whole way.

From My Horoscope (Susan Miller)

When the new moon and Uranus are together, it always signifies a change in one's domestic condition. Keep an eye on your parent, too - specifically your mother - who may have news about something going on in her life that you will need to oversee.
- More on this later. (Truly freaky).

From thelawyer.com

Under a typical law firm structure the managing partner usually sits on the throne alongside their right-hand man, the senior partner. The duo is accountable to and elected by their noble peers - the rest of the partnership - who jointly own, share and administer the kingdom's profits and property. On a similar token, decisions on the future of the kingdom are made by the partnership.

Below them the populous fee-earning serf underclasses toil for fixed incomes. But these individuals never own the land and year after year the profits of the fee-earners' labours are passed up to their masters. The only way out of this cycle is to clamber up the slippery steps of the career ladder and be promoted to the partnership, where hopefully your voice might finally be heard.

At 23

I'm twenty three now. The last five years have been easy in spite of me trying to convince myself otherwise. Sure, like everybody else, I've had some shit to deal with but this is a happy post and some of the good stuff that has happened should find place here. Of the top of my head these would be: scoring the winning penalty in 2004, publishing my first article, name-dropping philosophical conversations at a random tea-shack in Orissa with the guys, figuring out that I can be near the top of class, discovering Michael Moore, discovering I was "hot", discovering my fondness for lemon tea, discovering sitcoms on DVDs, going to Hyatt and Goutam's just for the heck of it in the middle of night, discovering Goa, cycling on a beach, trying my hand at squash (and figuring I sucked at it), figuring that I wasn't so bad at tennis, camping in the middle of nowhere, countless conversations with Sanjit and the guys at Vien, scoring from long range at Spiritus, playing soccer with the most passionate group of players I've known, tales of the city, taking the mickey out of the teacher in class, gorging myself with food during an internship, catching a rat with a suitcase in a hired studio, cycling to the top of a hill only to walk down to the river in its valley.

I don't know if the next five years will be as good and I can't remember if the five years preceding these were any better but its been a good trip and its important that one acknowledges that.